Maybe the title of this post should really be: learning to let things go.
As you likely know I've started a new full-time technical writing contract. I'm really enjoying the work and the people. It is a big adjustment to go from working at home to working in an office. But I'm very much enjoying it. I'm a social animal and it is refreshing to be around people all day again (though I do miss Murphy).
I initially believed that I could manage my 40 hour a week job, my full-time cycling training, my freelance writing, and the general stuff of life....
Well, guess what? I can't. It took one week and one particularly long Monday night spent in front of my computer for me to realize this. Turns out Marc was waiting for this realization to sink in. So I had to make a hard decision and I've had to give up my freelance writing contracts. This is frustrating to me since I really do enjoy the writing I was doing for these clients and frankly it takes a long time to find good reliable freelance clients. I aslo felt badly telling these clients that I could no longer work for them. Luckily everyone was very understanding and told me to let them know when I have time to start working for them again.
This letting go of my freelance writing contracts is a big step forwrad for me. I guess the life experiences from the past few years have finally sunk in. Marc reminded me of three years ago when I overextended myself and had my first real ulcerative colitis flare. He reminded me of the stress headaches, the sore teeth (I was grinding them while I slept) and my rather short temper. I didn't want to go back there.
So I've got a new attitude. Do what I can. Don't stress about what I can't do. My priorities are getting in a good training ride on my bike, enjoying my bike, spending time with Marc and Murphy, doing a good job at work, and taking time to relax and chill out. Last night I spent the evening flaked out watching Top Chef Canada and Grey's Anatomy - this was after a two hour ride in the rain and a tasty meal out at our favourite Vietnamese restaurant. To say it was a relaxing and enjoyable Wednesday evening would be an understatement.
Right now as I sit here there are things that probably should be done. Laundry to be put away. Cycling clothes to organize for Friday. General tidying. Ah well - it can all wait. It is 9:30 and I think I'll get ready for bed and relax with my book. Life is short and all this rushing around really doesn't get me any further ahead.